World Cup Special – World Cup TatJune 11, 2010
The World Cup is here!
From now until 11th July, we’ll be treated to the spectacle of the greatest football nations of the world, battling it out to win the Jules Rimet trophy. You may not had known this, but in the weeks leading up to this event, a campaign was waged to lighten your wallet by selling you World Cup related tat. In the case of this fine nation it meant anything that happened to be embossed, sewn, or printed with the St. George flag. Some of my readers may remember the post where I exposed the crap that was shamelessly peddled for St Valentine’s Day. Today I bring this service to you once again, in honour of the World Cup. I hope you enjoy looking at the following in growing disbelief as much as I enjoyed finding them. Some of these items brought tears to my eyes…
First up, we have some world cup merchandise from Waitrose. It’s tasteful (relatively) and sober, as you’d expect from such a fine store – and it’s boring.
Tesco’s offerings were rather shabby. A big disappointment to me after their stupendous effort for St Valentines Day. I didn’t bother taking photos there. Asda, on the other hand, didn’t let me down. They had a set piece at the entrance so you could see how it all fits.
Now let’s have a look at some of these items in more detail. First up – a lunchbox in the shape of a football shirt!
An England Afro wig!
I see this and think of David Bowie’s The Laughing Gnome. That was not one of his finest moments. This, would be nobody’s finest moment.
A few days later, I went to Stratford, walked into a pound shop and was confronted with this:
My eyes moistened as I surveyed the tat before me. I didn’t know where to start, but I had to start somewhere. Here’s an England mullet cira 1983.
And a cowboy hat.
And a Tutu. Now put them all together. I’ll just leave you to freefall into your own private hell.
The Churchill dog is moonlighting!
Gott im himmel! Was ist das?!
This week, I was at the Elephant and Castle, taking a picture of a decorated Elephant, which is part of the Elephant Parade in London. Once I finished, I decided to walk around the small shopping centre. I then found a shop that sold this:
Actually the lamp is not too bad. This however, is bad news.
And this is just pointless (I say this as if the other items had a purpose).
Finally I found this display in a local shop.
Here are the items in more detail. I have nothing more to say here.
Leaving this crap aside (pleeease!), I’m ready for the games and I can’t wait. My football knowledge is practically non-existent, but it doesn’t matter. England’s first match tomorrow (Saturday) is against the USA. If we don’t win this one, we’ll be properly stuffed. IN-GER-LUND! IN-GER-LUND! Come on IN-GER-LUUUND!