New Year – New You!January 6, 2012
It’s 2012, a signal for the new and the opportunity once again to do what you’ve promised since the last millennia: to create a better life. There are many paths to this goal and the numerous books, DVDs and TV shows gathering dust for 11 months of the year, fall over themselves to help you come January 1st. I have distilled this hardy perennial to the simple diagram below, what I’d like to call The Hopeful Circle.
It’s easier to start a January diet in warmer climes. The warmth and brightness of the sun makes it a pleasure to consume meals replete with fruit and vegetables. In La La land, the mere mention of a carbohydrate drives a person to furiously shake the water off their solitary rocket leaf, lest the expansive qualities of the clear liquid pile on the micro-calories. Here in Blighty, we have cold, dark, wind and wet: therefore, we’ll snort chips, pies, pizzas and ale to keep warm. The duvet looks more enticing and inviting than a session at the gym, but the fitness/diet industry continue to put a magnifying glass on our ever increasing gut: like the imminent collapse of the global market and the (potential) ending of the world on the 21st December isn’t already enough to occupy the mind. And speaking of the mind: this is also the time of year where we decide to train our brains like Rocky to be a lean mean wish-making machine. Because dammit, this is the year we win the brilliant job/have a great relationship/forgive our parents/get a dog. Failing this, we leave it all to the alignment of the planets to spell out our (hopefully) beautiful future.
Looking around Waterstones in Piccadilly this week, I found the usual life transforming books and DVDs. But something has changed. Back in the day, a fitness book would have had a basic title like How To Get A Six-Pack, or for a diet book something like The Silly Fad Diet. Not anymore, ladies and gentlemen: the titles are now using the language of self-help books and sometimes it’s hard to know if you should be buffing up your body or invoking your angel. Here are some I found:
Trust me, if I was my own gym, I would not be Officially Fat™
If I stretched a bit further for the remote control, what would I win?
Wellll, it’s an Olympic year after all. It would be rude not to.
Is it just me? Or is this a book title missing an Oprah show?
Diets for the modern age: shift the lard, save the world – winning!