You read the title correctly, dear reader.
A young man from Barnstaple, Devon, appeared in court after trying to have sex with an ambulance. Fuelled by drink and drugs (cannabis and amphetamine, if you’re interested), he started his seduction by setting fire to a packet of peanuts in a phone box. He then proceeded to spread himself across the front of this particularly big old unit. According to the police, it ‘looked as though he was attempting to make love to the front of the ambulance’.
Ambulances are used to picking up people. In this instance, the role was reversed and it didn’t end well. The would-be Romeo was eventually arrested for being drunk and disorderly after shouting insults at a Scottish police officer.
Once in court, in the cold light of day, when the beer goggles had cleared and the cannabis induced aphrodisiac had worn off, he admitted to taking drugs and alcohol that night, but had now seen the error of his ways. He was found guilty of being drunk and disorderly and in possession of drugs. He was given a £60 fine with a six-month community order.
It is not known if the ambulance intended to sue for damages.